I touched on this topic briefly last week when talking about the beauty of stillness. Change is something we are all dealing with at the moment. 2020 is a year which no one could have foreseen and we have all had to deal with the changing circumstances. The turning point event is the return of children to school this week.
This doesn’t mean we are back to normal though but it is yet another change. We spent 6 months in our own bubbles and now we are being told it’s ok to leave them. It can bring with it anxiety.
For me, I have gone from having all my family at home with me, unable to go anywhere or really do anything, to back to a kind of normal where it is just me. I had to adjust my routine to accommodate the change at the start, and now I am having to adjust back- and we aren’t really “back”. So many rollercoaster changes in actually a short period of time.
When I think about my life overall, there have been so many changes. Some more gradual than others. On the whole (thankfully) they are changes that have been positive ones.
From being a child to an adult, from alone and then with a partner, from being a couple to a family for four. Not to mention the geographical changes. From living in Manchester, then Milton Keynes, Dubai and then back to Manchester again. We all deal with change, not just due to recent circumstances but throughout our lives. So we are already quite adept to change. I think the issue is the speed at which we have to adapt.
From being a child to an adult, that is a journey in itself and that happens with time, changing to accommodate children? Well we have 9 months per child to get to used to that idea. But the changes this year have been sprung on us so quickly. I remember celebrating my birthday at the beginning of March and finding it funny that we couldn’t shake hands anymore- not realising what was to come. The things we used to take for granted, like picking up some milk from the local shop without a mask, not being able to hug a loved one- or even see them depending on which part of the country you are in. We have had to adapt to this change, overnight and over the past 6 months. No wonder it can take its toll of our mental health! We humans are able to adapt to change but no one planned for a pandemic!
So taking the time to review some strategies to cope with change is actually the sensible approach. Taking time to rest and recharge and be mindful of our own mental health and overall well-being is perfectly valid. We have every right to move slow and take our time because this change was sprung on us with no warning. Rather than rushing through it all. Take some time.
This week in particular, there are so many mixed emotions with our children going back to school. So when they are there (and probably super happy to see their friends again) don’t be too hard on yourself and enjoy the silence. It’s been a long time coming. Don’t feel guilty for enjoying the peace or even… dare I say it… doing nothing! I am trying to go slower this month, there is so much going on at the moment, so where I can I want to go “slow” and be more mindful of my movements. This whole year has been super fast, so it’s ok to go slow.
I came across this resource created by the Samaritans which can really help with the process of change- for adults as well as older children.
Today is also World Suicide Prevention day. It makes me sad to read that suicide is the leading cause of death in new mothers. I also heard a statistic on the radio this morning that 600 people under 25 took their own lives last year and I dread to think how the lockdown has taken it's toll on those feeling this way. You are not alone, there is always someone to talk to. I am only an email or DM away if you want to chat.
Wishing you a wonderful week ahead,
Best Wishes,
Jen
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