I don't think I say this often enough. Yep, I'm guilty of it and I'm sure I'm not the only one. I know I should try more and make the time but we get so caught up in our lives and suddenly the time has past. Except it hasn't, there is always now...... Dads are awesome.
Dads get a little bit of a raw deal I feel. I know it's a massive change in a woman's life when she has a baby, not just physically but mentally also. I have found, particularly now I'm on Instagram more that there is so much support for mothers (which is amazing, don't get me wrong). But I just don't see as much for dads. Their lives change enormously too. And even though they don't give birth themselves, it is still a massive adjustment for them. Life isn't about them and their partner anymore, it's now all about the family unit. It's part of the reason I am so keen to ensure that Baby Toddler Adventure offers support and guidance to both parents. The Symposium that I host is open to both mums and dads because I feel it's important that every parent gets their opportunity to voice their concerns or worries in order that they can find support. So please do join if you are a parent yourself.
I recently subscribed online to a new magazine called Happiful. I'm trying to limit the negative news at the moment (very hard to do, I know). This particular magazine is devoted to mental health, I think even by the title of the magazine you can ascertain it's goal is to lift your spirits. What quite amazing is that this magazine is free! There is an app you can download onto your phone which gives you access to the digital copy of the magazine- for free. You can order the magazine in print for £4 a copy or subscribe for a year for £48 or you can read online... for free!
The reason I mention it, and I am not being paid by them to promote the magazine by the way!, is there was a very interesting article in the June edition about this very topic of becoming a new dad. It was the extraordinary story of Adam Bucklow and the article was entitled "From Zero to Parenthood- In Just Three Hours". The title alone was enough to make me stop and click. What could that mean? It turns out he got a phone call on night saying his girlfriend was in hospital, he rushed there and it turned out she was actually in labour. They didn't know she was pregnant. The whole time she was in labour she (and he!) were in disbelieve that it was really happening. Adam had to adjust to the fact he was about to be a dad in the length of time he took for his daughter to be born. He was completely unprepared. If you could like to read the article in full, I would recommend it. But what stuck with me was when he said the following....
I quickly discovered that there wasn't much support for dads. Every leaflet, house visit and check up focused on the mother - as they should. But I remember thinking I was the other part of the equation, too, and had equally been affected.
Dads require support after the birth of their child, one day to celebrate them doesn't quite seem enough. I want to advocate that both parents get the support they need after the birth of their child.
So Father's Day is important, not only to celebrate dads everywhere and the amazing job they do, but to highlight the importance of Paternal Mental Health.
I am lucky enough to have two amazing dads in my life, my own father and my children's daddy, my husband.
It is hard to sum up the bond I have with my dad, there are no words, very much like that Mastercard Advert which places the emphasis on how the important things in life are actually priceless. He is priceless to me. He always has my back, I know he is just a phone call away (particular in relation to car troubles...!) and he has always provided his support in a sort of way where he lets me make my choices and does an approving look when he agrees. I love hearing stories of his life, and how different his upbringing was to mine (he was born in Ireland). And it amazes me when I realise just how far he has come, the journey he has been on, and how he grabs hold of life with a full enjoyment and a kind of confidence I aspire to.
I needed to have someone on my side,
Someone who was loving and true,
I had to know that I mattered to someone,
One of those someone’s is you.
Because you always believed in me,
I came to believe in me too,
You built my strength and confidence,
To see the tough times through.
Thank you dad for believing in me,
Thank you for taking my side,
Through all the ups and downs of life,
And every bumpy ride.
Another man I am lucky to have in my life, is my darling husband. He would joke that he should have more than just Father's Day to be told how much we appreciate him, and he is right. I should, and will, tell him just how grateful we are that he is as amazing as he is. I would be truly lost without him. We approach parenting as a team, and he is the star player in my eyes.
Who is your star player in your life? What are your views on Father's Day? Have you got your gift yet?
Best Wishes,
Jen
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